Question one: Why Isn’t My Career Where I Want It To Be Even Though I Followed All The Etiquette!
The mere fact that you’re asking yourself this is something to celebrate because it means you’re ready for growth and clarity. The reality is, most of society’s “rules for success” are just plain wrong and this includes what your family and friends say (unless, of course, one of them is a career expert!
If you followed “the rules,” it’s not surprising that you may have ended up on the wrong path. Take a good look at each step you took and what rules you followed. Which ones didn’t feel right to you? For example, did getting that extra degree to excite you, or did you do it because you thought you needed the credential? Were you trying to make your parents or even your boss happy? Be truthful.
More often than not, being true to who you are requires breaking rules. I’ve worked with hundreds of clients, and almost every person has an example of following someone else’s rules and experiencing the frustration of it not being right for them. But for those who have broken rules because of the alternative approach as a result of them being true to themselves? Not a single one has ever regretted it. Jeff Bezos, Bill Gates Elon Musk are all well-known rule-breaker, and you can see how far it’s gotten him! Once you accept this, you can create a path that is absolutely the right path for you.
Why Do I Feel Like A Failure When I Mess Up Or Don’t Succeed?
Believe it or not, failure is critical to being successful. You need to experience it in order to learn and grow. When mistakes happen, which they will, you need to manage your mental chatter and reverse the negative thinking. Instead of branding yourself a failure, view each time you don’t succeed as an amazing learning opportunity.
Here's an example: My client Karen was recently laid off after only being in her role for two months. She made a critical error that resulted in the decision. Rather than letting the situation get her down, I helped her see that the role she was fired from was one that she was already feeling uneasy about. We started to see the firing as a gift, as staying would have ended up creating more angst in the long run. Because she was able to see this event as an opportunity, she’s used her time job-searching to re-think her career. Now, instead of seeking out another position, she’s starting her own business, and she’s more energized than ever.
Remember: Feeling like a failure is a choice. Choose a different path. Don’t let it affect your self-worth.
Even a job you love w